Do any of these scenarios sound familiar?
Whap! Your spouse fires a criticism your way. You find your peace-loving and compassionate self hijacked into a battlefield; words are weapons and there’s no retreat.
Your teenager has discovered independence and expresses it by telling you all the mistakes you made as a parent. Now there is nothing you can say that they want to hear. You see the Great Wall of China coming up between you. You want to be there for them and keep them safe. You long for even a tiny window into their world. What are the magic words that will bring the two of you closer again?
Sometimes the battlefield is in your own head. You’ve got a pack of jackals biting and barking . . . “What’s wrong with me?” “I’m such an idiot.” “I should have done better.” “I’m never going to be enough.” You’re exhausted and have had enough of the onslaught and just want some peace.
And there are the times when you can’t find any words at all. You’re co-worker talks at you through your whole lunch break. You really didn’t want to hear the details of their son’s latest ball game. You feel irritated and resentful, but want to be kind and considerate. How can you be considerate and enjoy your lunch break?
Whether you bottle it up, attack back, defend, or huddle down and take cover; you end up with a sick feeling in the pit of your stomach and wish you knew another way through this. How can you meet aggression and conflict and still be true to your values of love and compassion?
If any of this has you nodding your head and:
- You value relationships that are honest, supportive, and fun.
- You are willing to question your current ways of relating
- You’re working to embody compassion and peace.
- You’re longing to express what you care about most in a way that can be heard.
GLBT Friendly